It wouldn’t be a typical season of Mystery Science Theater 3000 without a Hercules movie, and the revival has an interesting example of this genre.

The Loves of Hercules stars strongman Mickey Hargitay as Hercules and his then-wife Jayne Mansfield (“the thinking man’s Bettie Page”) as his love interest Deianira. It’s a European feature, but it’s the first time Herc is not dubbed (although Mansfield is).

Herc’s wife is killed in the first five minutes so he can have a relationship with Deianira (Mansfield). Seems her dad, the King of Ecalia, was killed thanks to  Licos, who almost looks like a cruel Rex Harrison. So, she’s now the Queen, and has to undergo a trial where Herc tosses axes at her. She lives.
She’s also supposed to marry someone else, but he’s killed by Licos, who wants to take Deianira’s throne. Herc isn’t sure who to believe, but hopes to figure it out. He also fights a monster that looks more like a rejected Rose Parade float.

Later, he’s captured by the Amazons and their queen Hippotyla, who wants Herc until she decides to turn him into a tree like all her other ex-boyfriends. That sounds like Hercules Unchained, where the evil queen turns her ex-boyfriends into wax figures. Anyway, Hippotyla even drinks a potion that makes her look like Deianira which works until she’s killed by an angry tree she used to date.
Of course, Hercules wins in the end and Deianira while a chorus sings us out.

The episode also features the first appearance of the small orange robot, Waverly. He’s not welcomed with open arms, or as Crow says “You can’t Raven-Symone us.”

It’s possible Waverly will be back. Why make a bot you’ll use only once?

Herc has to toss axes at Deianira because of some trial to show if she’s guilty of murder
Hercules has chosen the 9 ax, and the pressure is on.

Hippolyta, the Amazon queen, looks at the latest man-tree in her forest
“A few more moments and his suffering will be over”
What about us? (That, of course, sums up the show).

Next up:  Can Korea make a better monster than Denmark?

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